Saturday, August 29, 2009

The Asian penis in popular culture

So I finally got around to seeing The Hangover, the wildly popular comedy about some dudes who run into trouble while highly intoxicated on a bucks night in Vegas. It was pretty funny. There has been some discourse around the blogs recently about the way the film perpetuates a number of ethnic stereotypes. It's possible to see it that way - I didn't worry about it and just enjoyed the film for what it was.

However, one scene in the movie struck me as notable - a scene when the effeminate Asian gangster Mr Chow (Ken Jeong) jumps naked out of the trunk of a car. One thing you don't notice is his penis, which is apparently so small that it's barely visible in that camera shot. It struck me later that despite the story later explaining why he is in the trunk, there is nothing in the plot that explains why he should be naked. It certainly adds to the humour of the scene, and apparently it was Jeong himself (a comedian who loves making jokes about his unimpressive penis size) who had the idea for the character to be naked. Jeong is a funny guy, but I wonder if he questions his role in perpetuating that common racial stereotype in popular culture - the Asian man with the small dick.

It clearly made an impression on one reviewer, Bobby Rio on the TSB Magazine website, who when mentioning the cameos lists "Ken Jeong (who flashes us his tiny Asian penis)". WTF? Given that Jeong is Asian, wouldn't his penis be Asian as well?). Rio has since removed the words "tiny Asian" from the review, presumably after myself and another Asian guy gave him sh*t in the comments.

(I've written more about Ken Jeong and his penis-flashing habits here.)

Let's take another movie, the stoner comedy How High. The two black lead characters are sharing their college fraternity with an Asian kid who is a prodigy, but also has a small penis. He even says to a woman at one point "I got 2 inches of hard dick." Which no doubt made the films teen male audience chortle about small Asian dicks. Hooray!

In the clever award-winning Australian mockumentary series We Can Be Heroes, actor Chris Lilley rehashes this stereotype. In one segment, Lilley's yellowface character Ricky Wong talks about how similar Aborigines are to Chinese, adding that one of the only differences is that an Aborigine would have a much bigger penis.

Now, let me say from the outset that I'm not sure whether this stereotype is true or not. And since I haven't gone around f***ing a whole bunch of dudes of different races, I'm unlikely to get the background research that this article really needs. (Sure, I'm familiar with my own - exceptionally so, in fact - but that's a pretty, um, small sample. Plus I'm mixed race so I don't even know where to start with that.)

I could try checking a diverse bunch of guys out at public urinals, but would probably only come away with a beatdown. I wouldn't be surprised if there's some truth to the stereotype though. Does that matter? Maybe, maybe not. They say girth is more important than length. Do Asians have more girth? I don't know that either. (Sorry. What, you thought this was gonna be a serious academic study?)

But the stereotype is mostly being spread by white males. Do a google search on "small asian penis" or something like that, and you'll find a whole heap of derogatory joking references to Asians and their junk. (You'll also find a whole lot of porn too, but that's another matter.) It's funny. You don't hear a lot of women going around saying stuff about Asian penises, but there are plenty of white guys with opinions on it and ready to make jokes.

So why are so many white guys obsessed with Asian guys' nether regions?* (And why does no one realise how gay that is?)

I guess it makes sense. The prevailing stereotype is that people of African origin have significantly larger members than white guys. Now if you're the sort of white guy who cares about these things, its a bit of a prick to the ego (pardon the pun). But that lost self-esteem can easily be regained by focusing on someone who allegedly has even less than you - the Asian man. This is not to say that Asians necessarily do have less, but it clearly suits non-Asians to believe so. For white dudes who feel threatened by Asian men for whatever reason, it is reassuring to fall back on their perceived superiority downstairs.

The problem with this (well, one of them anyway) is that despite most research playing down the importance of penis size, its something men are fixated on. The other thing you'll find from googling "small asian penis" is Asian guys posting on forums worried about whether they are normal in size. I heard that in the Vietnam War the US planes dropped extra-large condoms over enemy territory, in order to psych out the Viet Cong who were meant to believe they were fighting massively-endowed supermen. I'm not sure if this actually did intimidate the VC; you never know, maybe it made them fight harder out of resentment and jealousy. Or maybe they didn't even make the mental connection. In any case, well-pronged or not, the US lost.

Young males these days are forever bragging about the dimensions of their todger, and insinuating about others' lack thereof. Hey, I do it all the time, it's funny. But on a subconscious level, its a bit like alpha male herd behaviour in animals - seeking to establish status and dominance by a demonstration of superior strength and physique. Because for many men, a penis is more than just that thing that you piss and f*** with; it represents the very essence of a man's masculine identity.

So you could argue that the wide currency of the Asian-small-penis stereotype represents an attempt at racist domination by the white man over the Asian man.

Or maybe Asians just have small penises and it's funny. I dunno - like I said, I haven't done it with enough Asian guys to know for sure.

By the way: don't think too much about why I was googling "small asian penis" to begin with, all right? Just assume it was research for this article.

Above: This Filipino man shows off his impressive cock.
Below: Vietnamese people are known to have a whole lotta Dong.

Like this article? You may like these:

Race, IQ and penis size

Comebacks to stereotypical and racist comments

A bit about Asian men and white women

Random comic genius: Eliot Chang on racist questions

Random comic genius: My Black Friend

Asians accused of being bad drivers - by a senior citizen


  1. Eddie Murphy delirious on white, black and yellow dicks.

    "White people don't believe it. What's funny about it,
    white people are the ones that made up the rumor.

    "You know, black people have tremendous dicks,
    but I don't believe it !"

    You know remains of the first dick was found in Africa ?
    Big ass piece of bone dick on the floor.

    "What is this shit ?"
    "It's an old dried up dick."

    "That means the first dick belonged
    to a black man."

    Dicks. We got the shit for it.

    We got nice asses, too. We got our shit on.

    You see a white dude would be in this suit like this.

    "All right, man ! All right, maaan !"

    I got a friend, Doug, there go Doug, my friend,
    Doug's ass is way up here on his back.

    Ain't it, Doug? Doug be getting shit stains on his collar.

    And in restaurants be reaching for his wallet:
    "Lemme get my wallet"

    Coz we got our shit hooked,
    all this is hooked up with black people.

    Chinese people are fucked all around,
    coz they got little dicks and little asses.

    They do and its fucked up the way they walk.

    They be walking all light coz they
    ain't got no shit pulling them down.

    Now, a brother's dick is too big it fucks
    up his balance so he'd have to do all this shit..

    Everytime you see a brother
    in a wheel chair he ain't always cripple.

    He's got big shit hanging down !

    That's why all the brothers model
    they drawers in the newspapers. Think 'bout it.

    I've been seeing newspapers every sunday morning.
    A white dude in his drawers...

    Never have no balls in they drawers.

    Smiling and shit. If I had no balls
    I wouldn't be smiling this shit.

    "I don't have any dick !"

    Brother be standing there..if a brother models
    his drawers they need an extra fold in the page.

    They're selling underwear but this niggers
    dick is in my coffee.

    "Want me stir it for you ?"

    That's some true shit."

  2. Thanks bonoboboy, I have added the full-length youtube video to the post.

  3. Oh trust me boys, there's some biiiggggg yellow whoppers out there!!!

  4. Hey, it's me again! You might thing I am obsessed with this kind of things... I am not, I swear! But I can't help it, these kind of posts are... um, often the most interesting on a website. It's not just because "sex sells"- I am very interested in stereotypes, the way (and reason) they are formed, their meaning, etc.

    Ok, now that I assured you all in my honest and scientific intentions, let's post the real comment.

    I do believe it is all about racist stereotypes... More or less. Some say stereotypes are harmful because there's a certain true in them (say, 10%), and that's why they are so harmful. If they were completely made up with no base in reality, nobody would believe them. This way, people are able to believe it's true even in more cases and situations than it actually is.

    However, I am not saying there's true to this stereotype. To be honest, I don't have any... um, personal experience with Asian penises or their owners. I don't remember any Asian male people in porn movies (not that I watch porn, noo, I'm just, well, saying) so I can't really judge myself.

    All I know is that the difference- if it exist- is really small (or at least that's why "serious studies" say), around 1cm or something. That's nothing, not worth the whole hype.

    On the other hand, it's horrible to know such a thing can make people feel bad about themselves. Hey, women are able to have a very low self esteem if they have small breasts or cellulite, but this one isn't any better, either. Is it really about masculinity? About what a person thinks about himself? Is it really that impossible for a guy to feel confident and manly if he has a small dick? and what does "small" even mean? If he does the job, he's good. Dicks are not for looking anyway. They have more interesting job to do.

    PS-Public urinals checking isn't the best method. In fact, it's useless. You can't say anything- and I mean anything- about man's penis size unless you see it when a guys is, well, "excited". This is another urban myth and I have no idea why it's even there.

  5. @ Mira: does reading these posts make you obsessed with Asian dong? Perhaps, but I wrote them so what does that say about me?

    What you say about checking out dongs at public urinals is true. Not that I'd know, of course.

    Anyway, if you are at a urinal and see an "excited" penis, I think it's time to get the f*** outta there. Some bad stuff might be about to go down. Except of course if you are into that kind of thing. It could even be George Michael.

  6. @ Mira: does reading these posts make you obsessed with Asian dong? Perhaps, but I wrote them so what does that say about me?

    Hmmm... It shows you like (or at least you wouldn't mind) women from all over the world to think about Asian dong- in a positive light?

  7. Agree with @ry. There are some really big Asian dicks and to be honest, I bought into the whole stereotype and was totally turned off by Asians. Then I started really noticing Asian men and I was really turned on by their smooth skin. Now I am a bona-fide "rice queen" and trust me too, Asians are NOT lacking in the downstairs department. QUITE the contrary they can definitely give many white guys a run for their monies! I also strongly feel that Asian men tend to have big cock-heads. Anyway, the "small asian penis" is a big, fat myth. Whoever came up with it cost me several years of fun with Asians. I am so glad I dumped that stereotype.

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  10. @ Anon:
    :S please give some warning next time if you are going to leave a link to a blog full of erect penises. It was a bit much for my senses.

  11. I'm a Black female and I've been with my share of Asian men. I've also been with Hispanic men, but mostly Black men.

    With that said, I have to agree with the stereotype. Asian men, in general, are indeed smaller by average. I haven't seen an Asian penis that is at least 6" yet. Black men are by far the largest. It's almost the opposite with them where I've only encountered a few shorter than 6". I think Hispanic men reign in girth. However... I greatly prefer sex with Asian men.

    Why? I've found even the ones that aren't all that in bed to still be way more passionate and involved than Black and Hispanic men. Instead of doing what they think "girls" like, they're trying to do what "I" like. And, for me, personally, there is just much more of a connection. I almost date Asian men exclusively now. Even after having sex with a very well-endowed Black after years of not being with any, I still found myself wanting an Asian man instead. (And still looking ;-))

    So, small penis or not, it's what's attached to the penis that matters the most. If an Asian man has a small penis, he should focus more on exuding sexiness, having stamina, paying attention to an individual woman's (or man's)sexual needs, and knowing how to use what they do have to fulfill those needs. Size only matters for those who don't have much else to offer.

  12. this is just from my own experience... think most Asian men are growers not showers, and tend to have harder erection than growers, and a lot of women prefer the hardness as it can hit different angles etc...

    asianmanbanger, we need to get together lol, just kidding.... but seriously though.

  13. Wow, you are full of shit. Asian penises are generally small, though that doesn't make it right for niggers or the white man to joke around about in the tube. Man I tell you, some of the things people said to me bout my dick. I would like to smash their fucking skulls in with a hammer if I could. But I won't I just swallow that shame, and walk away, because if I break that motherfucking quarterbacks arm the 5-0 and the principle is just gonna be another redneck or nigger with a big dick.

    That's reality for you. How do you like it? Wake the fuck up.

  14. @ Anon (October 8, 6:51am):

    To who are you referring to?

    If it's any consolation, your fondness for the word "nigger" indicates that you are a massive dick.

  15. @ Eurasian Sensation
    lol man, I thought u were mix asian?
    I was referring to you about asian penises being generally small is a myth, when it's not. It's true.

    But that doesn't make it right to joke about it on TV. I say nigger how much I want, since I've been called "ching-chang" or "wide-eyes" or "gook" for my whole life. And that's been totally okay in this western society. But when a guy calls a nigger a nigger, he becomes either arrested or accused of being a racist. Or both. FUCK THAT!

    And how about this fact: the average IQ in Africa, is 80. Yeah, 80. But if you say that, you are a fucking racist, but not by saying asian man has small penis.

    It's the hypocrisy im sick of. I'm sick to my stomach of it.

    It's okay to joke about asians, but not niggers, gypsies and the worst, jews?

    I don't want to go way off topic here, but it's funny how we are supposed to feel bad about the fucking jews all the time. Do you know how many innocent died in Rwanda or the Combodia genocide of Pol Pot? Do we ever read about that in the history class? - NO! And that was WAY less time ago then the 1940's Holocaust, which I by the way laugh at. A few german SS with mp44's, can easily be overran by hundreds. No they didn't want to fight these jews, they wanted to walk into that oven and die. And then want the world to feel sorry about them. Fuck that.

    I'm sick of how it's okay to laugh at asian penis joke in a blockbuster Hollywood movie. But if I say the word nigger, or that jews are cheap (which is fucking true). OOHH!! then the whole room turns against me.

    (I do love Hollywood blockbuster triple-A movies btw... beside the fucking asian penis jokes)

  16. @ Anon:

    I would take seriously your hurt feelings at racist treatment if you didn't appear to be an absolute racist prick to every other minority group.

    Tighten up your shit or don't comment here anymore.

  17. I came back to check this kinda late. *wink* @ yellodevil.

    Anonymous, so you don't like when other people of other races use disparaging terms towards your races, yet you turn around and do the same thing back. How can you call it wrong if you're doing the same thing? Worst of all you refer to my people as "niggers" and have the nerve to reference the innocent people that died in Rwanda? You're one of those people that probably doesn't even make sense to themselves.

    Eurasian Sensation- I read some of your other posts when I was here last. I forgot to come back and compliment you. Good stuff.

    1. Oh please, what are you even doing here?

  18. @ Eurasian Sensation
    Lulz, I'm not racsist faaar from it.

    Got friends who are black and other races. Still I respect the person just not the society. See what I'm trying to say? My black friend isn't a "nigger" to me. Of course not! Still I will not have it that society or you for that matter staple me as a racist for using the word nigger. I been racially abused for years and the word racist wasn't said ONCE under all these fucking years. So there you have it. My point of view.

  19. I'm latina and I don't know shit about 'asian dicks'. I just got lost on the internet and found myself here somehow. Anyway, I think it is nasty that some slutty black bitch has to tell all of you how many white black asian and hispanic dicks she has had in her dirty pussy. It is probably the size of a canyon.

    1. Thanks for showing up to tell us what a stupid judgemental racist bitch you are. Now fuck off.

  20. Its just one man's need to dominate another. I grew up in a multi-cultural community and the media never really bothered me because we INTERACT with people of all ethnicities. The Asians and non-asians are pretty similar physically. And I notice the media tries to exaggerate the disparity.

    Come to think of it, its the same shit they're doing back in the 1900s with "Anthropology Studies" on how blacks are inferior due to their "fill in the blank attribute". This is the same racist terminology they're spewing a century later due to competition from yet, another group of different humans.

    I'm 5'10, 165, and I'm 8 inches and 6 around. And this is my gf and I:

  21. Hey guys, i am azn, and have a 6.7" x 6.0" schlong...i am 5'6", 135 lbs, and have average sized feet and hands. I never measured myself until this recent internet bullshit about azn men being probably is true, but what gives the racists a right to make fun of us on this ? Boy was i surprised when i compared the numbers. I always thught my girth was a little thick, but this is on the 95% scale for all males, prob 99 for aznz...Imagine my was a nice feeling....i have no idea why i am built this way, only can thank my ancestors...all my GFs have made comments about my size...sorry , will not ost pictures cuz i guard my privacy on the 'net..

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  24. You know little about history. The VC had about 3 times the amount of deaths than US troops. The US pulled out, it didn't lose. South Vietnam lost. Not the US. The US wasn't even in the end of the war. The US would've won if it stayed, but out of public pressure the government pulled the troops out. Learn about history you ignorant twit. Evidently you know little about history... you tool.

    1. Two things:
      1. Er, so the US won, then?
      2. Your butthurt overreaction, coupled with name-calling, says volumes more about you than me.

  25. Koreans are the smallest and Filipino are average. Happy? Source: I have slutty friends who prefer Asian men.