Friday, November 9, 2007

Social workers not sexy, says new survey

I've just found another reason to hate my life. Speed-dating agency Fast Impressions has conducted a survey of 400 of its members, to determine which professions were the "sexiest" and "most dateable". You can read more about it here. Social workers, it turns out, are ranked somewhere near the bottom. That's right, not the top or the middle, but the bottom. F@#*.

Here I was, thinking that my profession's stereotypical qualities of compassion, striving for justice and sticking up for the powerless, were actually desirable things. But no! How wrong I have been. No wonder I never have sex. Apparently we are a bunch of namby-pamby bleeding-heart socialist wankers with no balls. Ok, maybe I'm reading too much into this, but without any explanation I'll have to draw my own conclusions.

Now perhaps I shouldn't get too shirty, since technically I'm not a social worker, but they didn't include "community development worker" as one of their listed professions, but "social worker" is clearly the closest parallel amongst those on the list. (No one knows what a community development worker is anyway, which perhaps makes my profession more mysterious and hence more attractive... but perhaps not. Anyway, I digress)

In the professions listed by females in the survey as being the sexiest, at the top are those you might guess: doctors, architects, models, firemen (it's the uniform and the long hose, apparently). Social workers are considerably lower - only 28% of women think its a sexy profession, and 61% would possibly date us. This puts social workers slightly higher than politicians, rat catchers, the terminally unemployed, parking ticket inspectors and human guinea pigs. (Ok, the last 4 professions weren't on the list, but you get the drift). Models rated highly on the sexy score (67%), yet only 56% on the dateability score.


(click on table for enlarged view)

It makes me feel better to know that social workers were not totally on the bottom - however, if you look at those professions we are rated as more dateable than, they have some pretty obvious negative points. For example, women considered social workers more dateable than plumbers (known for poking around in toilets and exposing their hairy butt-cracks), bartenders (substance addicted and may spike your drink when you're not looking), politicians (known for not being human), air hosts (quite possibly gay), dancers (gay), artists (sensitive but broke and possibly gay) and male models (quite possibly vacuous, gay and prone to doing drugs and having orgies). But that's about it.

And looking at the professions rated as more desirable than mine, it just gets more depressing. Lawyers (sure, they make lots of money and look glamorous on Boston Legal, but they also lie, cheat and snort coke), property agents (did I mention lying and cheating?), builders (can't utter a sentence without using the word f@#*) and musicians (substance-addicted, vague and unreliable - trust me, I used to be one). And accountants. ACCOUNTANTS! Apparently they are as sexy (or unsexy) as social workers, yet are considered more dateable. Sh#t, just cut off my testicles now, I clearly won't be needing them.

It may be purely a coincidence, but the top four most dateable professions listed (doctor, architect, lawyer, property agent) are also pretty much the highest earning. Hmmm... Of the males in "caring" professions listed (doctor, social worker, teacher and nurse), only doctors rate highly in the dateability stakes. Is it coincidental that they earn much more than the other three? Hmmm. If sex appeal correlates with bank balance, then the size of my annual wage means that I may as well make my vow of celibacy now so as to save on frustration later. I actually do have enough faith in womankind that I don't believe that money is as important as it seems... although in any case, we males will judge a woman based on her breast size, which is hardly any more noble than judging a man on his income.

But of course, I'm not really the kind of person to put too much stock in a survey of 400 people. Such things are always a bit flawed; after all politicians were the least sexy (14%), yet Bill Clinton was a politician and he has had more sex than anyone outside the porn industry, so surely that proves the survey is bollocks?

In a way, though, its actually a bit comforting. I always thought my lack of success on the dating front was due to me being an ugly, arrogant prick with no discernable personality and a chronic body odour problem. But now I know its just because I chose an unsexy career! It's all clear now. Where do I sign up to be a fireman?

(PS. If you clicked on the link you will have noticed that I am getting my information from a site called girl.com.au. Don't think too much about why I am looking at such sites.)

13 comments:

  1. Sorry for commenting on an old post, but it was there... And it was interesting...

    Apparently, women want money and sex. There's no much psychology in there.

    Sure, many of them don't realize it. They were taught not to think about sex that much- being a slut was never considered good. Also, they were taught not to be materialistic, that's why many of them don't really desire to marry a millionaire.

    On the other hand... Doctors, lawyers- they seem "reliable". Sure, they do have money, but women won't admit that part of being reliable is exactly it.

    And what about sex? Women like men who seem "passionate". Some professions require more manual than intellectual work, and (for some reason) sex and intelligence are seen as the opposite things. If a profession requires courage, it's a plus- that's why firemen are so desirable.

    Social workers, on the other hand... Eh. They are seen as "kinda cute and all", but they don't really earn much and all that social working isn't really sexy and macho.

    Yes, in other words, women are dumb. They also tend to trust stereotypes way too much.

    ReplyDelete
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  2. @ Mira: yeah, women are dumb, but I don't think y'all are any dumber than us guys.

    There's a joke I heard somewhere about a man who had 3 women of varying occupations interested in him... they all did various amazing things to prove their devotion to him. Eventually he chose ... the one with the biggest breasts.

    Btw, you are free to comment on old posts, there is about 3 years worth of old posts for you to get through if you so desire.

    ReplyDelete
  3. I'll take my time to read and comment. You cover various interesting topics (racism, stereotypes, penis size, ethnicity...)

    Eventually he chose ... the one with the biggest breasts.

    Typical.

    Well, is it?

    The problem- the real problem here- is that many people believe in stereotypes. So they actually expect firemen/doctors/actors to be sexy and great lovers. Shy guys are not considered to be great lovers. Or tomboy women. But that all crap.

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  6. It is comforting yet frustrating At the same Time. I am one of two males in my social work group class. It seems it is overpowered by females. I feel like in a group of working class feminists who want change the world. Sometimes it is fun, sometimes I have enough and feel totally unappreciated and lonely. I lose my patience very often. All that tolerance, soft-heart and empathy. You can't judge but love each and every. I have psychological skills that came naturally to me. I am good at reading people, understanding and counselling. I have been told that very often from many sources. But dayum I am still a man. In search of adventure, adrenaline rush and sex. I need to get my blood moving because it slows every day of my class. I get totally bored. I have no idea where I am going to, it's my second year at university and still I am not sure what social work is about. When I meet with friends, they talk passionately about engineering, design, law and many others. As for me, I don't even know where to start. I don't know how to seduce any girl because of my studies..

    ReplyDelete
  7. The men's results showed a much closer relationship between 'sexy' and 'dateable', with models, nurses, air hostesses and dancers all featuring highly on both scales.

    ReplyDelete